You Fight Like A Girl

Am I the only person that thinks girls can be unusually cruel and vicious?  

During difficult times women can be the greatest pillars of strength known to mankind and by the same token girls can be incredibly mean and catty. 

There’s the key difference. There are girls and there are women. I’ve written on this topic before on a previous blog that’s now gone private. For now, let’s elaborate a little bit more on this subject.  There are crucial differences between the two. 

Women empower other women and feel empowered by doing so.  Lifting each other up during difficult times and helping each other grow. Even if it means the apprentice surpasses the instructor.  As a means of thanks and gratitude the apprentice in turn empowers the instructor by teaching them what they’ve grown to learn. There by empowering each other. This is an exemplary show of growth, maturity, gratitude and womanhood. 


A girl will berate, belittle and possibly hold another friend or colleague back out of fear of being surpassed in knowledge and accomplishment. Rather than help accomplish goals or encourage another friend, insecurities arise and take over and quickly dispel any probability of a flourishing, mature and thriving friendship or relationship. 

Studies across the world have been done regarding this very subject. The most absolute and root cause…insecurity. It’s them. Not you.  Interestingly enough, many of the fights that ensue are brought on by the insecure girl having an inner struggle with herself and seldom has anything to do with you personally.  If a grown woman is responsible for the sabotaging it’s due to her lack of ever having identified her own personal weaknesses and addressing them.  Therefore she behaves like the mean high school girl who gets her rocks off belittling the girl that’s capable of expression and showing emotion.  A warped sense of self comes into play here. The fun house mirror that they’re looking into that makes them look and feel tall although on the inside they’re small and scared. 

The road to hell was paved with the bones of men who did not know when to quit fighting.

Paulette Jiles, Enemy Women

My question is how are we as women able to identify if we’re guilty of this behavior ourselves?  Well, let’s think a little bit.  For the most part, we’ve all been the mean girl.  Whether it happened early on in adolescence or later on as we came to mesh with others in our close circles, maybe you were mean to a sibling.  We’ve experienced the torture or been the torturer.  It’s not hard to identify, the hardest part is admitting to ourselves we’re guilty of it.  We know what it’s like.   We are vicious, unrelenting when we’re really mad or hurt. 

Whenever you are confronted with an opponent. Conquer him with love.

Mahatma Gandhi

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25 Random Things That Parenthood, Age & Experience Have Taught Me

Parenthood, age and experience have taught me the best life lessons.  It doesn’t have to be perfect to be good. 

  1.  I can’t plan every little detail out. Instead I set attainable goals.  Life means sometimes my perfect planning will go ary. 
  2. I’ve lost my ability to whisper.  
  3. It’s easy to find Reislings to drink.  Oops I meant reasons.  I come from a long line of bad habits so I don’t keep it on hand.  I’d hate for my children to paint a picture of me holding a glass.  That’s not how I want them to remember me. 
  4. I like structure, order, neat and clean.  Now that I’m older I’ve realized my rigidity can cause severe eye twitching anxiety.  So I’ve created a chore board to get the kiddos engaged in helping me keep the house clean and I pay them well. 
  5. Secret signals fly over my head. I’m talkin’ I miss them like an idiot misses the point.  I don’t have time to play charades.  Just give it to me 
  6. Nature is one of the greatest healers.  
  7. Parenthood doesn’t come with a manual.  We all do the best we can with the knowledge and resources we have available to us.  Not a single one of us is a perfect parent. 
  8. I pray a lot. For everyone, even for the clients on my massage table.  Prayers of thanks and gratitude make me happy. 
  9. I love and appreciate my husband’s mind.  He’s got a big beautiful brain and a heart to match.  When you’re young, you take things like intelligence for granted.
  10. As long as I’m doing my absolute best at everything, I feel fulfilled and productive. 
  11. I admire all of the people that stay home to care for kids or work from home. I’m not one of them. I’m not strong enough to.  I believe that requires a special person with much self discipline.  
  12. Music is still one of the most powerful languages, escapes, motivators, and mood changers out there.  
  13. Being able to read nonverbal cues from others is a gift. 
  14. Although I love company, I crave to have my family alone. 
  15.  I really could survive in the wild out of the contents of my purse for at least a week.
  16. Time goes by so much faster the older you get. 
  17. Depression can happen to anyone. 
  18. Don’t collect things.  Collect love. 
  19. I now understand what my mother meant when she said “Now I know why some animals eat their young.”
  20. There are fallacies in using work as an escape. 
  21. The stresses of balancing family, kids, work, school and spouses are real.  Just because it seems under control doesn’t mean it is. 
  22. A minimalist lifestyle is so much more appealing the older I get.  Seems like shedding years of weighted clutter is much more fulfilling than filling blank walls.
  23. Your sense of smell never lets you forget anything. 
  24. Children manipulate you way faster than you could ever manipulate them. 
  25. Life is too short to leave important words unsaid. 

I’d love to hear random tidbits from you

Letting Nature Heal. Pedernales Falls State Park.
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If the world was blind, how many people would you impress? 

In a day in age where looks and talk are so highly valued have you ever thought about how you’d fair if the world was blind?  How many people would you impress? 

This is something that caught my attention. I was on twitter recently and saw this question posed.  Genius.  

I know that I’ve fought some good fights.  Some for people I’ve never met, some for my kids, some for other kids.  I’ve put myself in harms way to protect children from being hurt, I’ve spoken out about taboo subjects people avoid.  I’ve yelled at and confronted a complete stranger for  yelling and pointing his finger in his girlfriends face while she sat in silence crying with her head bowed.  I’ve run after a complete stranger after seeing her steal someone’s purse.  I pray for everyone on my massage table during the duration of a massage.  I’ve given all of the money I’ve had to someone who needed it more.  Most importantly I’ve taught my girls how to care about others.  Sometimes I wonder what my purpose is, but I’m certain it’s not to be a self serving individual.  Although my attempts seem feeble in comparison to others and I’m not sure if I’d ever make any heads spin, it’s the absolute most I can provide. 

Giving

I slept and I dreamed that life is all joy. I woke and I saw that life is all service. I served and I saw that service is joy.

Kahlil Gibran

What about you? I’d love to hear! 

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Wardrobe Essentials For Busy Women

Time is a precious thing and for me so is my appearance.  My hubby works in a retail setting where women of all sizes, shapes, colors, ethnicities and styles are displayed in front of him.  I’m not young enough to pull off the messy bun and yoga pants look anymore.  I’ve also taken on many new ventures that require a little effort.  Needless to say, I’ve managed to get myself wardrobe essentials that whip me from shabby to chic in no time.  No iron fabrics are a Godsend!  Love all of that low maintenance stuff.  

I’ve gone through spurts where I’ve been thick and thin.  The older I get I seem to shrink and stretch like elastic.  After having had to donate years worth of clothing some new with tags still attached and some old that I swore I’d one day get into. I decided to simplify my life and donate the clothes to charity.  I decided to invest into staple pieces of clothing that gave me growing room and would still fit if I shrunk some.  Not likely since I seemed to have plateaued but it’s nice to have options. 

I’ve compiled a short list of my absolute must haves for a busy working mom. 

Now, I will say that I’m partial to purchasing my clothes from NY & Company because they have the best sales and coupons, usually have free shipping and because everything stretches!  I normally turn to Versona for accessories but I’ve managed to finagle some great deals on Amrita Singh statement necklaces through Zulily

Here are my latest and most versatile purchases 

  • Blazer 
  • Button up stretch tops in solid colors 
  • Black Ankle Pull On Pants
  • Super Stretchy Jeans
  • Simple Black Dress 
  • Couple of solid colored skirts
  • A few printed items 
  • Tons of accessories to change the look

Work Essentials: Solid Top, Printed Pants, Flats for running
Basic Black Blazer, Printed Top, Jeans
Same Blazer & Top as above with a red skirt


    Bright solid yellow with Blue printed skirt

      Flair A line skirt with Bamboo Top

      Tons of different accessories to change your look

      Statement necklace for work

      Versatility is key

      My accessories arsenal
      Go for the Gold
      Scarves & Pashminas for a little change
      Play with Layers, textures & colors

      Jackets are for the birds

      *I am by no means a fashion expert.  I just know I like no iron stretchy pants and skirts that don’t itch and don’t require spanx because those things are the devil!*

      Hope my little go to list helps out other busy women.  

      I don’t mind making jokes, but I don’t want to look like one.

      Marilyn Monroe

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        Self Reliance In A Codependent World: Lessons For My Teenage Daughter

        Learning to be self reliant in a codependent world is a rare gift that I hope you will find to be extremely liberating.  To my sweet Elisabeth, remember that everything I say and do for you is a calculated move.  That’s one of the blessings of motherhood.  You’re forced to think ahead for the sake of your children.  

        It’s a funny thing to sit and chat with children about how you grew up.  The dynamics in every family and culture are so different. The times have changed drastically too.  I remember being in school and participating in various activities during our field day. Remember those?  That was the best day of the whole school year for me.  Getting your class to compete against your friends and their home room teachers in games of tug o’ war, what a blast! The number one thing I remember was winning in order to get a medal and ribbon.  Mediocrity wasn’t celebrated.  We didn’t get ribbons for participating.  We didn’t get our names printed on the school newsletter or paper for acknowledgement of participation.  We had to earn that.  Nobody ever suffered everlasting scars of torment from it.  Everything is so different now.  You can’t celebrate one person’s accomplishments without acknowledging every last tidbit everyone else did.  I’m here to tell you sweetheart, that you need to grow up.  You’ll have to be tougher than that if you want to be a strong, independent individual.  Being coddled that way isn’t teaching you anything other than to feel entitled.  The bad news is-The world doesn’t owe you a thing, okay?  

        Recently, I was on Facebook, swiftly reading through posts and I came across one that caught my attention.  A young woman was on a tangent about how no one she knew ever liked pictures of her and her husband, she continued on about how she speculated this was probably due to jealousy.  Jealousy?  What if people weren’t on Facebook that day, or use automated posting apps like I do?  I seldomly have time to get on and actually read posts.  Most of my stuff is auto scheduled a month out.  Besides, why did people have to comment or like these posts?  Was she waiting on people to celebrate a picture she’d shared?   Naturally, my mind wandered the more I read on this….I forgot to like it and comment.. but that’s neither here nor there. 

        As my oldest I hope I’ve instilled in you the caliber of my very pungently strong being so that you don’t feel you have to rely on the amounts of likes and comments left on social media platforms as a means of validity for anything.  You my dear, should know your worth and what you bring to the table.  Never wait for anyone to celebrate anything for you as a means of definition as to who or what you are or what your happiest moments mean to you.  Remember what I always say, it’s quality over quantity. I’d rather have 4 quarters than 100 pennies when it comes to the people I surround myself with.  I thought about this young lady and her post for several days, I began to think maybe she felt entitled to have people falling all over themselves to compliment her and comment and like what she was sharing.  I’m supposing no one ever explained to her that someone else’s opinions shouldn’t matter to her so long as she’s happy.  As I delved deeper in thought I came to the conclusion that only a person wearing a mask would care what anyone else thinks.  When you’re truly happy with yourself and what you’ve accomplished is someone else’s happiness for you really that relevant to your being?  Is that what you’re going to allow to gauge your overall happiness?   

        Gloria Steinem Quote

        I guess your old lady could be wrong where this young woman is concerned, I mean I’m no expert.  I’m just an over analytical fart.  In essence what I’m saying is, thank you for listening when we talk to you.  I hope you never change.  My hopes for you are that you continue to march to the beat of your own drum.  You’ve taken risks in competitions at school that ultimately would’ve scared the bejeezus out of me, and that makes me proud of you.  You’ve never stopped to check and see if the world is going to applaud you.  That thrills me because the world doesn’t stop to applaud you.  It doesn’t have to.  You’re doing what makes you proud and happy.  You’re not stopping to look around to see who’s watching.  You’re only stopping to help others along the way.  That’s a sign of a flourishing young woman.  Your self reliance and self confidence are shaping you each and every day and they change and grow with you.  Continue on with your balance of confidence and humility.  Stay hungry, stay focused, stay humble. 

        Love, 

        Mom

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        The Silent Women: Have You Fallen Silent?

        It was an exceptionally busy week for me. I had a great time at work and had some very interesting conversations. This week got me thinking about the silent thoughts we have as wives and mothers, and perhaps women in general.  I wanted to bring attention to women, depression, and marriage ruts that are so easily fallen into.  I wondered if we are all silent wives.  I wondered if we all fall silent.

        While our children sleep peacefully we fall asleep praying for them. Silently begging and pleading for them to always be well, thanking God for every last second with them. While our husband’s or partners are at work we manage to maintain a job, home, kids and everything else that comes our way. We silently ignore our own needs to ensure that everyone else’s are met and satisfied first.
        While our parents find activities to occupy their retired time, we silently weep and take in the bittersweet beauty of watching someone we thought was invincible get older and celebrate the great moments we’ve had with them.
        While people mistake our kindness for weakness and sacrifices for stupidity, we lay awake at night silently hoping that everything we’ve done is right and worth it.
        While some of us wander through life completely oblivious to the battles and sacrifices we make, taking life in stride. We stand silently enduring the struggles of depression, carrying with us the secrets of our partners indiscretions, the burdens we feel of not being able to communicate the weight on our shoulders.
        We, the silent women bear the weight of smiling to make it through another day without letting anyone know what we’re really feeling. We, the silent women maintain our composure while our other halves work ridiculously long hours because keeping up with the Joneses has taken over our lives. We don’t mention the pressures of staying fit and looking well for our other half while they take for granted the effort and time it takes to shave our legs, wax our unmentionable parts, manage a home, take care of children, work and muster the energy to be intimate.
        We cry quietly on the inside waiting for someone who knows us well to recognize the fact that we’re exhausted, That we can’t make excuses for an absent spouse anymore.

        We silently endure in our relationships what others would call abuse or negligence of a spouse in order to fulfill our promises to our children and other halves and avoid anything or anyone that may rock the boat we’re on.
        We quietly accept to take on even more responsibilities as our children join more and more sports and activities; as our spouses request more of our support so that they can further their education or take that promotion.
        We smile and downplay the severity of our emotional distress so that it appears to just have been a rough day although if you leave us alone we weep on our way to work as an outlet for the stress we feel.
        We quietly carry on with the strength of a 550 horse powered vehicle, quietly but with much ferocity, humming through the streets not ever letting anyone know what’s really under the hood.
        We, the silent stand humbly awaiting a moment as rare as a Sasquatch sighting, for someone to ask us ‘is there anything I can do for you?’
        To all of the silent women out there, please know that I pray for you all on a nightly basis. I pray for you to speak up, to know that is okay for you to ask for help, I pray for strength and courage for you, I pray that you make yourself a priority. I pray for you ladies. I pray that you take a moment for yourself and that when you do, you can rest at ease knowing that I’ve heard some of your silent cries, that some of you have come to me to let go, and I’m happy to listen and continue to pray for you.

        Have you ever felt like you’ve fallen silent?

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        Rebel Without A Cause

         

        Wild Woman

        Have you ever felt like a rebel without a cause?  I’m talking, “I am woman hear me roar” rebellious.  More and more I’m finding myself to be more rebellious the older I get.  I’m not sure what’s happening here.  I’m finding that I’m challenging things that have been placed in front of me, questioning authority, pushing myself a little harder and not backing down for the sake of argument anymore.  I suppose it isn’t rebellion so much as growing up.  Although, most of the time it feels as though I’m rebelling.  Maybe, finding my voice; is a better choice of words.  I’m sure many would argue that, that has never been a problem for me.  I will agree that there was a point in my life where I had no filter on my mouth. There was no censoring of what I was feeling. I’m not sure why that stopped. Some would say that I matured, some that motherhood changed me.  Maybe it was a little of both. I remember at one point feeling that there was no use in stating what I felt because it fell on deaf ears.  Now, I feel like I should say it, whatever it is, for my own sanity; for the sake of not bottling things up, for the reason that I don’t want to return to feeling that what I say falls on deaf ears.  I’m not afraid of arguing anymore.  I’m not afraid to fight anymore.
        I think of my grandmother a lot when I think about how my life is changing, about how I’m changing. I think about her wild spirit and how my grandfather always tried to tame her, to tame it.  Is this what happens with age?  With maturity?  We end up reverting back to the freest version of ourselves?  I should hope so.
        Prayer of an Anonymous Abbess:

        Lord, thou knowest better than myself that I am growing older and will soon be old. Keep me from becoming too talkative, and especially from the unfortunate habit of thinking that I must say something on every subject and at every opportunity.
        Release me from the idea that I must straighten out other peoples’ affairs. With my immense treasure of experience and wisdom, it seems a pity not to let everybody partake of it. But thou knowest, Lord, that in the end I will need a few friends.
        Keep me from the recital of endless details; give me wings to get to the point.

        Grant me the patience to listen to the complaints of others; help me to endure them with charity. But seal my lips on my own aches and pains — they increase with the increasing years and my inclination to recount them is also increasing.

        I will not ask thee for improved memory, only for a little more humility and less self-assurance when my own memory doesn’t agree with that of others. Teach me the glorious lesson that occasionally I may be wrong.

        Keep me reasonably gentle. I do not have the ambition to become a saint — it is so hard to live with some of them — but a harsh old person is one of the devil’s masterpieces.

        Make me sympathetic without being sentimental, helpful but not bossy. Let me discover merits where I had not expected them, and talents in people whom I had not thought to possess any. And, Lord, give me the grace to tell them so.

        Amen

        by  Margot Benary-Isbert

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        The Secrets Of Women Revealed 

          *Disclaimer like the famous Will Rogers once said “There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.”  I am by no means an expert on the inner workings of every woman. However I am a woman and I know that my husband struggles to understand me. I don’t speak for all women I only speak for the vast majority that I have come to know and understand to be friends of mine.  We like to sit and compare notes with one another on our down time because we have nothing better to do.  To the gentlemen reading this blog today, I’d like to make you aware that this may or may not be of use to you.  May God be on your side, good luck.

        Me & Mrs Pacheco
        Gruesome Twosome

        Lesson 101: Men Feeling Like They Can’t Make Us Happy 

        • It’s not that you can’t make us happy it’s that you don’t listen and that makes us unhappy.  Believe it or not, we are delicate flowers, we only bite when we have to. 

        Lesson 102: Asking What’s Taking So Long

        • Have you ever tried to shower, brush your teeth or even pee much less get dressed while being interrupted every 20 seconds only to stop what you’re doing to go help 4 members of your family look for shoes, belts, a shirt, a coat, shampoo, toothpaste, or a tie you’ve asked them to put away a gazillion times?  Try it. See how far you get and let us know if you didn’t forget to apply mascara or shave a leg. 

        Lesson 103: You Think The Grass Is Greener On The Other Side

        • We’re all the same.  We all expect the same consideration we give.  If you believe otherwise you’ve got about as much chance as a one-legged man in an ass-kickin’ contest  at winning that one. 

        Lesson 104: Make Us Swoon

        • Yes we want to continue to be wooed, not smothered but a little romance is nice.  Hold our hands but don’t invade our 18 inches of space it gets too hot. We’re older now, gotta mind those flashes. 
        • It’s only okay if we spoon you, your legs are heavy, you can’t spoon us. 

        Lesson 105:  Make Us Laugh

        • Make us laugh but don’t be stupid or obnoxious, we’ll cut you. 

        Lesson 106: Never Begin Any Sentence With My Mother….

        • We’ll make sure that’s where you end up. 

        Lesson 107: Pay Close Attention To Detail 

        • This is and will always be your greatest investment.  Catch every little minuscule mention of something we love or of something we had as a child that meant the world to us. You’ll never go wrong as long you don’t get it wrong. Now if you bring home a gift your very first girlfriend mentioned she’d love to have…well, that’s goin’ over like a fart in church.  You better give your heart to Jesus, ’cause your ass is grass. 

        Lesson 108: Learn What Each Traditional Anniversary Gift Should Be 

          • But don’t take this too literally. For example, at the fifth year it’s wood, or silverware. The colors are blue, pink and turquoise and the gemstone is sapphire.  Alternative gemstones are rose quartz, pink tourmaline and turquoise.  Don’t come home with a pile of wood or a package of silverware. Put some romantic thought into it.  Explain why you chose a particular gift.  And absolutely never have another woman help you choose a gift because there’s no fool like an old fool!

          Lesson 109: Take Genuine Interest In What We Do

          • Give us tips but don’t tell us how to do it unless we ask you to. 

          Lesson 110: Love Our Changing Bodies

          • We’re hardest on ourselves.  We’re afraid of the younger dumber models out there.  Genuinely compliment us.  Don’t overkill it, just mean it. 

          We need people in our lives with whom we can be as open as possible. To have real conversations with people may seem like such a simple, obvious suggestion, but it involves courage and risk. -Thomas Moore

              The ordinary acts we practice every day at home are of more importance to the soul than their simplicity might suggest. -Thomas Moore

              To my husband Mario, thank you for always listening even though you’re hard of hearing.  Although you know I run a tight ship at home you’ve always managed to reign me in when I’ve been running’ around like a chicken with my head cut off.  Thank you for always supporting me and my crazy ideas and going with the flow.  Thank you for trying your hardest to keep me happy when I’m not even sure what I want.  Your effort, humility and sense of humor when all is up in arms is greatly appreciated.  Even though the timing of your sexual nuances can sometimes make my eye twitch you somehow manage to make me laugh.  Thank you very much for never buying me household appliances for Birthday or Anniversary gifts and for never saying “Well, my mom..” I knew you were a keeper.  Thank you for using that big brain of yours for other things than just sex and football.  Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.  To many more years. Happy Anniversary my love. 

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              A Day In The Life Of Monica

              Funny story: Yesterday I ate a piece of cake that was sitting out on our community table at work. I asked everyone in the break room if it belonged to anyone. I was told no. That everyone had gone next door and picked up goodies for everyone to share and it must be out and up for grabs. Like the girl I am I opted for the sliver of chocolate decadence. I swear within a few seconds of devouring it a co worker walks in and is visibly upset. When I asked what was wrong she asked if I’d seen a piece of chocolate cake on the table. Although my first instinct was to want the earth to open up and swallow me whole, I said “yes, I just finished eating it. I’m sorry, I asked if it belonged to anyone and I was told no.” Just then, I was informed my client had arrived and I left the room. 

              My Doomsday Chocolate Decadence

              AWKWARD!

              As I left for the day I was telling my husband and friend what I had done. As they laughed with mass hysteria and teased me they said “this is why I love you!”

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              Toddlers: Untamed Hearts

              I’ve been told many times that my life should be recorded, or that I should do stand up comedy. Hardy-har-har. Probably because the joke’s always on me right? So, I’ve mentioned a few times that both of my girls have my wild untamed heart. It’s true. They’re both wild in their own ways as am I. But my little one, oh boy is she giving me a run for my money. You know, I haven’t quite figured out why I’m being punished. 

              My mom tells me I was a good girl. Excellent in fact. I ate everything she made me, even told her what a great cook she was, I spoke in clear complete sentences by the time I was a year old. I took my naps, I was early to rise and early to go to bed. My kindergarten teacher Mrs. Stephenson told my mom I was the best napper in class. I was a bit of an over achiever if you ask me. 

              My little one on the other hand is on a mission from God (I believe this to be true with all my heart) to allow me the opportunity to test my better judgement or just straight up see if I can live the rest of my life in martyrdom. 
              Anyway, we were out buying some scratch off lottery tickets a few weeks ago. It was a warm Texas day. I was wearing my green cropped muumuu. So it wasn’t an ankle grazing one but cut to the length of the knees. My little one has had a love-hate thing going on with Disney’s Frozen. On this particular day she was loving it. She was singing and swaying the back of my dress from side to side as we waited in line. Despite my many pleads to get her to stop playing with my dress, she continued to ignore my requests and sing. As I got to the counter and I finished paying she was simultaneously ending her rendition of Queen Elsa singing Let it go; Coming to a close while belting out “The cold never bothered me anyway” she made her grand finale by lifting my dress over her head and shoulders exposing my granny panties to everyone waiting in line behind me. 


              This would’ve been livable if I had great legs or nice rump. In my mind it should’ve played out like the woman pictured above. 
              Instead, as I swatted my hand onto my dress to clamp it down and hide my granny panties, whilst speaking through gritted teeth and telling her we were leaving. I turned to face this. 

              The cashier stood frozen, hand covering her mouth and the woman in line behind me shut her eyes and began nodding her head side to side keeping her lips tucked into a tight line where she was fighting off the laughter that was threatening to bust out if she took one look at me. 

              I quickly bustled towards the door with my little one close behind and as I reached up to push it open my little one had taken a few steps back into the convenience store to eyeball some hotdogs and announce she was now hungry. I had no choice but to look back and face the people I was so desperately trying to leave behind. 

              All I could see was the line of people behind me staring and laughing hysterically. Thanks Pumpkin. Nothing on earth is quite as exciting or humbling as being your mom. 

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